Leviticus 18:22 says "You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. It is an abomination." Rick Perry is a huge fan of the verse...and he's "strong" enough to admit it. He's not alone; it's a pretty popular verse in the bible for hatemongers these days. From personal experience, it seems as if those who claim to follow a more "literal" translation are the most vocal in their praise. I wonder if they also follow these verses from the same book as literally (not a complete list, for time's sake):
Not to eat non-kosher animals (Leviticus 11:4), Not to eat non-kosher fish (Leviticus 11:11), Not to eat non-kosher fowl (Leviticus 11:13), Not to eat non-kosher creatures that crawl on land (Leviticus 11:41),To follow the procedure of Yom Kippur (Leviticus 16:3),To buy and sell according to Torah law (Leviticus 25:14)
I personally don't know many Christians that follow the Torah. Kind of goes without saying, right? So those holiday observations, eating kosher, and the whole buying-and-selling-according-to-Torah-law thing? Ignored, and observed mainly by those following Judaism.
To observe the laws of menstrual impurity (Leviticus 15:19), Not to have sexual relations with a menstrually impure woman (Leviticus 18:19)
Women who menstruate or have menstruated are unclean...that only compromises most healthy, adult, premenopausal women, at least 1/10 of any given month. Apparently, only prepubescent girls are in God's favor. Men who have sex with women while on the rag are also unclean, husband and otherwise.
To observe the laws of impurity of a seminal emission (Leviticus 15:16.)
And speaking of seminal emissions: men, when you ejaculate, you're considered dirty.
Not to eat creatures that live in water other than fish (Leviticus 11:43.)
Like shrimp, lobster, or any other seafood that isn't fish? Eating them is an ABOMINATION!!!!! Maybe the government should reenact DADT for those seafood lovers in the military...
The precept about the ritual uncleanness of a woman after childbirth (Leviticus 12:2.)
Are you a biological mother? You're unclean after childbirth. Goes along with the whole menstruation thing.
Not to reap a corner of one’s field, so that the poor may glean (Leviticus 19:9), Not to reap the very last end of one’s field, so that the poor may glean (Leviticus 19:9), To leave gleanings for the poor (Leviticus 19:9), Not to gather the gleanings, so that the poor may take them (Leviticus 19:9), To leave a part of a vineyard unreaped, for the poor (Leviticus 19:10), Not to gather the gleanings of a vineyard, so that the poor may take them (Leviticus 19:10), To leave the unformed clusters of grapes for the poor (Leviticus 19:10)
Strangely, there is a lot about welfare in there. In FAVOR of welfare. Apparently, you're supposed to set aside some of your crops/property/belongings for the poor. Class warfare or a literal translation of the bible?
Not to speak derogatorily of others (Leviticus 19:16), Not to embarrass others (Leviticus 19:17), Not to take revenge (Leviticus 19:18), Not to bear a grudge (Leviticus 19:18), Not to insult or harm anybody with words (Leviticus 25:17)
And speaking of politicians, you're not supposed to speak ill of others. God despises your campaign ads, just like the rest of us.
Not to plant diverse seeds together (Leviticus 19:19), Not to crossbreed animals (Leviticus 19:19)
Plant hybrids? Mules? ABOMINATIONS!!!!
The prohibition against shaving the area of a nethek (an impurity in hair) (Leviticus 13:33), Men must not shave the hair off the sides of their head. (Leviticus 19:27), Men must not shave their beards with a razor. (Leviticus 19:27)
All of you guys that shave your faces are in trouble with God.
The courts must carry out the death penalty of burning (Leviticus 20:14)
Those who are fans of the death penalty and quote the "eye for an eye" passage should be raising hell (no pun intended) with those ungodly states that execute their criminals by means of electric chair, gas chamber, lethal injection, and/or firing squad. Criminals should be BURNED. Well, except for women who lose their virginities before marriage...they are to be stoned to death.
Not to imitate idolaters in customs and clothing (Leviticus 20:23)
Better not read Vogue.
Not marry a woman born from a disqualified marriage. (Leviticus 21:7)
If you're a divorced woman or a widow, don't plan on marrying again.
The precept regarding the ritual uncleanness of a m’tzora (person with a skin condition) (Leviticus 13:12)
If you have a skin condition, you are unclean. That includes you, acne sufferers. That includes me as well, since I have eczema. But being a woman who lost her virginity before marriage who likes shrimp and wears two different types of fabric at once with a farming family that grows abomindable hybrid plants, I think I was doomed from the beginning. I do believe in welfare, but I don't agree with the death penalty, so those two cancel each other out, I guess.
Not to tattoo the skin (Leviticus 19:28)
I guess I should quit keeping a personal count...
Not to castrate animals (Leviticus 22:24)
Don't believe the hype: neutering your pets and/or farm animals is WRONG in the eyes of the lord.
Of course, there are tons more, but I really didn't feel like going through them all. Lots of sacrifice and offering rules have been omitted, but you get the drift. And, again, this is only the book of Leviticus: a fraction of the massive bible.
Quite unattainable to follow all of the above rules, so why do so many people choose the homosexual passage to quote? Actually, there's another one: If a man lies with a male as he lies with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination. They shall surely be put to death. Their blood shall be upon them. (Leviticus 20:13). So, do those against gay marriage/rights/the repeal of DADT believe that homosexuals should be executed?! For who they love?
But it's not the love part that bothers the hatemongers. Well, not the emotional part of love, anyway, but the sex. Why focus on other people's sex lives, when it concerns consenting adults? Sure, the physical aspect is an extremely important and potentially wonderful part of an adult relationship, but there's so much more than that. Maybe not in cases of one night stands, but again, that's no one's business except for the parties immediately involved (and their cheated partners, if they exist).
You see, I'm not one who follows the bible literally. In fact, I'm educated enough to know that's impossible, because unlike so many Christians, I've actually read it. The good book contradicts itself over and over and over again. Hundreds of translations through different languages over hundreds of years by scholars that add their own prejudices and beliefs (St. Augustine and "original sin," anyone?) have diluted the meaning beyond belief. Not to mention all of those pesky books left out at the Council of Nicea, which were apparently not "divinely inspired" enough. By the way, I've read a few of those books, and they can be quite entertaining (Lillith is a hoot).
Why am I doing this? Am I some godless liberal that hates Christianity? Not in the least. I just believe that everyone should be educated about the beliefs they are told to have. The Christian bible is more full of love than hate, about welfare instead of intolerance, about not judging others. Picking and choosing verses to perpetuate hate goes against everything that Jesus taught, and if you call yourself a Christian, you should probably strive to be as Christ-like as possible.
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Okay, so "God despises your campaign ads, just like the rest of us," was my favorite quote of your post, until I read, "You see, I'm not one who follows the bible literally. In fact, I'm educated enough to know that's impossible, because unlike so many Christians, I've actually read it."
ReplyDeleteI seriously laughed out loud, at 3:15AM.